Life flies by so quickly. I often forget to cherish the little moments I have with the people around me. I always get caught up in work, or even in myself, that I’m not sure about the people around me. I take life for granted everyday. It needs to stop. I want to start living. Working 13 hours a day isn’t going to help me do that. I want to live for those moments that make me smile, not for what the next problem in my life is going to be.
I don’t really blog on this one much anymore. Life has been pretty good. I’ve learned a lot in the last week. Basically I’m happy. I love that feeling. I love everything about my life right now. I start Canes again tomorrow. I’m nervous and excited all at the same time. I hope you are all doing wonderful. :)
This woman, Reba McEntire, will always hold the biggest place in my heart. She was my mothers hero. Before my mom passed away, she wrote Reba McEntire a letter saying what she was dying of and how much she admired her. Within a week Reba McEntire wrote her a letter back, along with tickets to her next show, backstage passes, an autographed photo, and a bunch of other stuff. She made my mothers final wish come true. 4 months before my mom passed away she got to see her hero play live and meet her. At my moms funeral, “She Thinks His Name Was John” by Reba McEntire was played. The song is about a girl with AIDS. It was my moms favorite song. The fact that Reba made my mothers dream come true, it makes her my hero as well. Reba McEntire gives me hope.
I lost one of my best friends recently. It’s funny how you can be so close for so many years and then all of the sudden they tell you how annoying you are and how they don’t want to be around you anymore. It hurts. It really does. I feel like I’m losing a lot of people. That people just don’t care anymore.
I feel hated. I feel like no one even wants to talk to me anymore. I put forth the energy to try and no one gives it in return. I bet if I never said the first word to most people, they wouldn’t think twice about talking to me.
When I was little, as most people know, I watched The Lion King with my mom every Saturday morning before she passed away. Well what most people don’t know is how much the song “Hakuna Matata” means to me. Yeah it’s a simple, cheesy, cheerful song, but to me it has more meaning than that. I remember 2 weeks before my mom passed away, we were watching the movie and my mom turned to me, looked me in the eye, and said “I’m not going to be around much longer, but I want you to remember Hakuna Matata. When you’re upset, when you’re crying, when that first boy you’re in love with breaks your heart, listen to that song. Imagine me singing it to you. Just say Hakuna Matata outloud and remember everything is going to be okay.” I only remember this because I just found a letter from her in one of my boxes that said these exact words and when I read it, it took me back to that day. God I miss her… Hakuna Matata.
Today was the first day in awhile I looked in the mirror and thought “How could anyone love that?”
Today today today
- Last night I had a dream of my moms funeral. I’m really freaked out right now. It was just like when I was little, except I was an adult now. I witnessed it all. I woke up crying. I’m not sure why I had the dream though?
- Today marks the 8 year “anniversary” of me being John Cenas fan. I know that probably won’t mean much to you guys but he is my hero. It means the world to me.
- I woke up sick so I guess I am staying in bed all day? Whatever. I miss my bed.
“Life flies by so you have to embrace it. Forget the past because you cannot erase it. Live the dream and learn to chase and when you can almost taste it, it’s all come alive.”
Life lately has been wonderful. I can’t express how happy I am. It feels like everything is going right. It’s an amazing feeling. Everything I want to happen seems like it has been happening. I have great friends, family, and everything in general. I can’t wait to see what else is going to happen in the future. :)
When you think it’s the end of the road, just take a deep breath. It’s all going to get better before you know it. We’ve all been to the point where we want to give up, but there is always going to be at least one person out there that shows you that it is all worth it. And it is.
